Sorry. I love that movie (The Rock, if you have to ask). We used to watch it twice a night in college – once on a copy with crappy video and good sound, and once with a copy that had good video and crappy sound. Typically put away a block of Kroger’s brand pepper jack cheese and a bag of tortilla chips along with a couple of 40s while doing it.

No, I do not wonder why I am fat.

When DJ Hawaiian Shirt aka MEESTER CHREES posted this topic my first thought was to whine. After all, I did not go home with the prom queen.

To be honest, I don’t even remember who the prom queen was. Though, by careful scientific calculation, I’m sure that whomever she was, she’d want to hook up with me now, definitely, unless she’s married, in which case she’d just be thinking about in the back of her head.

(waits for someone from high school to read this blog post and either direly insult me or post pictures of how dorky I am was back then)

(waits for Marshall to say something so he can break out Photoshop and have some real fun)

Anyways, I realized I did have a drink that was popular. It’s not that I don’t think I make good drinks (SHUT THE HELL UP REST OF THE COCKTAIL BLOGGER COMMUNITY) it’s just that I don’t typically sit around and tweak them until they’re perfect.

THAT’S MY EXCUSE AND I’M STICKING TO IT.

But some of them have been popular.

I don't know KP is hosting it but hey.

Back a few years ago (2, to be precise) I decided to come up with drinks named after a bunch of folks working up to Tales of the Cocktail 2009.

Oh, to be young and stupid in those days!

One of the drinks I did I named after local bartender Derek Brown. To call him just a “bartender” is to call Tiger Woods just a “golfer” or “trashy girl?aficionado” or to call [POLITICIAN RANT DELETED].

Those motherfu[DELETED] how much I [DELETED].

Sorry.

Basically, this was an easy drink to come up with: Dolin Blanc is delicious. At the time – and I don’t think he still is, but I could be wrong, and don’t have time to double-check so as to give this post the delicious patina of last-minute-panic that DJ Hawaiian Shirt evidently just drinks in from my posts – he was a brand rep for Domaine de Canton.

Thus, the Derek:

The Derek
3-4 leaves of mint
1/2 ounce Domaine de Canton
3 ounces Dolin Blanc
1 dash orange bitters (Regans #6)
Lightly muddle the mint and Domaine de Canton in an old-fashioned glass.? Add the vermouth, bitters, and ice.? Stir gently to mix.? Garnish with a fresh sprig of mint.

(The post I originally put this in explains why it has so much better a picture than I’d normally give a drink.)

The really cool thing about this drink is how easily it’s modified; just sub out the Domaine, really. Try The Bitter Truth E***X***R, for instance, or Berechovka – two of the drinks I’ve had recently – or even better, try Hum. Replace the Dolin Blanc with Caparno.

Okay, there’s one of my best drinks. People really seemed to like it.

But this is SCOFFLAW’S DEN! We don’t just kowtow to MxMo with one drink! NEIN! NYET! NO! We do multiple drinks!

So, I give you, by far, and without pictures, the two most popular drinks I’ve ever come up with. In some synchronicity, these are also named after people I know. In fact, it’s my brother and my sister-in-law.

Back in the hectic, lawless, far-flung days of 2009 I lived with my brother and his?fianc?e. As they approached the sacred rites that would bond them as one, forever destined to take care of two flagrantly obnoxious cats, and one condo surrounded by some?pusillanimous (and some?recherch?, I admit) neighbors, I suggested I’d make up drinks named for each of them. They liked the idea and I disseminated some test drinks which, soon enough, got narrowed down to these. The fact that their cakes would be soaked in Grand Marnier gave me the appropriate animus.

The Matt
2 ounces Crown Royal
1/2 ounce Grand Marnier
2-3 dashes Regan’s #6 orange bitters
Top with Coca-cola
Build in a low ball glass. Stir.

A lot of my family likes Crown & Coke and so I built from there. What’s scary about this drink is how easily it goes down, as the GM just makes it … well, damn easy to drink. Even if you replace the Crown with rum (as one guest did at the reception) or the Coke with diet (as many guests did).

The Cathy
1/2 ounce Grand Marnier
1/2 ounce vodka
Top with sparkling wine/champagne
Garnish with a long twist of orange peel
Build in a champagne flute

Like the other drink, I also wanted to make sure these were easy to make for the bartenders. When I tested this for the first time I was actually asked (surprisingly to me) to make it stronger, thus the vodka.

Warning note: Five of these might mean you nap somewhere you’d rather not do so.

So that’s it for this MxMo. Thanks to DJ Hawaiian Shirt for hosting, and Paul for organizing. Cheers!

Second off – Phil Greene alerted us to this post covering the cocktails from the DC bracket of the Domaine de Canton competition.? I know I’ve tried a couple of those – the Domainatrix by Rachel Sergi, now over at Againn, and the Thai’s the Limit by Gina Chersevani of PS7 (which also features your Scofflaws in the Washington Post video about it).? I want to say I’ve tried the Owen Thomson (of Bourbon) Jack O’ Ginger but I might just be confusing it with another drink.

So – now to drinking and reading.

When I moved into my current apartment my parents commented on how it seemed like all the boxes I brought in had one of two things in them – either books or liquor.? Well, duh, I thought – what are my hobbies?? Cocktails and reading!

Them's a lot of words!

As I settled down recently to reread a ten part alternative history by Harry Turtledove (the Timeline-191 series, if you must know, where the South won the War Between the States thanks to not losing Lee’s Special Order 191 to McClellan), I did it my usual way – most of the time outside, on my balcony, drinking a beer and smoking a cigar.

mmmm, beer and a cigar

As I read through the first book How Few Remain that was mostly fine, but then I got into the Great War series with American Front.? That series introduces what has to be my favorite character in the entire series, Quebecois farmer Lucien Galtier.? Unlike most of the characters in the book (slight spoilers here, I’m afraid) his life doesn’t entirely suck.? In fact, his often humorous sections really help out through the grimmer parts of the series.

It was also his sections quite a while ago that got me introduced to Calvados.? Calvados is an apple brandy produced in France, and while the character drank basically a moonshine variation of it – after all, he’s a farmer in Quebec, not in the Calvados region of France, and it’s so often wartime with occupation forces etc yadda yadda yadda – that I had finally managed to get a bottle a few years ago.

I still remember the first time I actually tried Calvados.? It was on a date at a place called Sonoma here in DC and I was so excited to see it on the menu that I spilled red wine on my shirt.? (Hey, that was like over 2 years ago!? I had no idea what I was getting myself into.)? I didn’t care for it much straight, and the bottle I had tended to only be used in cocktails for a number of years (that number being two).

As I started rereading the series, I thought, hey, I should drink appropriately for the books.? Cigars are fine, a lot of the characters smoke them though the US characters will remind you repeatedly that their cigars are bad compared to Confederate ones (the Confederacy, in these books, own Cuba as well as the prime tobacco growing parts of North America).

At first this started with sipping on Calvados while reading them, which helped with the Galtier parts to feel more “into it”.? Depending on night of the week and compunction, I started adding in other things.? Whiskey, for instance, is an easy choice for a lot of the characters, as well as beer – which I had before, naturally – and occasionally for the characters from Sonora and Chihuahua some mezcal, specifically, Del Maguey crema de mezcal.

Of course, you can’t keep up with the characters in the book, but on the other hand, keeping it close to what you’re reading helps a lot.? I feel an urge to read The Great Gatsby again, since I think it’d fun to drink appropriate cocktails to that – though it is kind of funny to try to figure out what to drink while reading my Warhammer 40K novels.

Right now?? Well, I’m reading The Space Wolves Omnibus and therefore drinking ale.? In fact, I started tonight with a Sam Smith Yorkshire Stingo.? Sure, I probably should drink something more viking, but they drink ale in the books, and I don’t have any Skullsplitter.? A lot of the characters drink amasec in 40K, and the description of that seems to be “brandy” as it’s distilled wine.? Hey, I’ve got plenty of brandy in my house…

What do you drink while reading?

I’m keeping tonight’s short, not to disrespect it’s namesake (who is busy working right now) but because it’s already been a long day for me.

If you’re into cocktails in the DC area and haven’t met Chantal Tseng yet, you need to make your way to the Tabard Inn on a Wednesday or Thursday night and meet her.? She not only makes some great drinks but is a lot of fun to hang out with whether she’s behind the bar or just chilling.

When thinking of a drink for her, I wanted something a bit classy, but I also remembered her Tabard cocktail which included tequila.? She’s engaged to Derek, so I thought – hmmmm, maybe we should have some Domaine de Canton in there, too.? Well – whaddyaknow.

Yes, that's not very good champagne, but I don't have good champagne in a small bottle.

The Chantal
1 1/2 ounces tequila blanco (inocente)
1/2 ounce Domaine de Canton
2 dashes orange bitters (Regan’s #6)
Champagne
Stir over ice and strain into a cocktail glass.? Top with champagne.? Garnish with a long twist of lime peel, or if you’re as bad at it as I am, three small pieces of lime peel.

If you try it with other kinds of champagne, let me know!

[Tenth in a series of drinks named after bloggers, mixologists, and random others who'll hopefully be at Tales.? The first post in the series is here.]

I have all that stuff but good day in the morning, am I lazy.

You might be surprised to hear that because if you’ve been reading the Den in the past week or so I’ve been coming up with a new drink every night to name after people going to Tales even including one that already had ginger liqueur in it.? I had already figured on combining Mixology Monday with my perhaps Quixotic quest but when Marshall pointed out how much he liked ginger I thought, hey, I should name one after him.

I wasn’t happy with how it came out.

That’s not entirely true; it wasn’t bad, it just didn’t seem the right drink for my cohort in crime drinking cocktails so I debated what to do next.? As I gathered up the fixin’s for a cigar a name popped into my head.? Sure, it’s not perhaps as custom as some of the drinks I’ve made, but when I got it right it felt like you could drink a lot of these, and that’d get you pretty sloshed.

Stop making fun of my pictures or I'll take pictures of you and make fun of them.

The SLOSHED
2 ounces rye (Rittenhouse 100)
1/2 ounce lemon juice
1/2 ounce Dr. McGillicuddy’s Vanilla Liqueur
1/2 ounce Domaine de Canton
1-2 dashes Dr. Schwartz’s Cherry Vanilla bitters
Combine all ingredients in a shaker with ice.? Shake, then strain into a chilled cocktail glass.? Garnish with a whiskey soaked cherry.

It’s not a bad drink at all.? I ended up using vanilla liqueur for two reasons: 1, I didn’t want to use vanilla vodka, and 2, I didn’t have any vanilla simple syrup.? Had I had the latter, I would’ve considered also cutting up some fresh ginger and muddling it in the vanilla simple syrup.? I also did completely ruin one cocktail by forgetting the bitters, generously given to me by sylvan, didn’t have a “dasher” thingamabob in the top of it.? OOPS.

If you try it with the G.E. Massenez, I think it’s also good, and this drink could definitely use some tweaking.? I’d love to hear if you tried it, and if so, if you tweaked it at all!

[Eighth in a series of drinks named after bloggers, mixologists, and random others who'll hopefully be at Tales.? The first post in the series is here.]

This month Mixology Monday is hosted by Matt over at Rumdood and his chosen theme is ginger.? Big thanks for Matt for hosting this month!

Ginger is one of my favorite spices.? For me, ginger is one of those flavors that is just as tasty in the summer as it is in the dead of winter.? During the cooler part of the year, ginger provides a bright, warming flavor to your cocktails.? During the warmer months, ginger tends to cool you down and provides a certain zing that is down right refreshing.

There are multiple ways you can incorporate ginger into your cocktails.? For the freshest flavor and more of that ginger bite, you can muddle several pieces before shaking or stirring up your libation.? You could also make a ginger syrup.? This route will provide a lot of sweetness along with that fresh ginger flavor.

Additionally, you could go the liqueur route.? Currently, one of the hottest new liqueurs on the market is Domaine de Canton.? Domaine de Canton is a mix of baby ginger and French cognac into a wonderful liqueur.? It is fairly sweet and has a nice fresh ginger bite.? Canton is a high quality product and quite delicious.

One of the most surprising drinks I’ve ever had contained Domaine de Canton.? At PS7 in DC, Gina Chersevani has a drink on the menu titled “The Cure.”? Actually, the full name is the “Recession Blues Cure.”? Priced at $5, it is certainly a cheap drink.? So what’s in it?? Miller Lite and Domaine de Canton.? That’s it.? Sounds horrible doesn’t it?? Well, it is fantastic!

The Cure
2 oz Domaine de Canton
4-5 oz Miller Lite
-Build over ice in a chimney glass.? Garnish with julienned ginger.

Now this may not be the same proportions at PS7, but for me, it is the perfect mix.? The sweetness and bite of the Domaine de Canton really highlight what little flavor is in Miller Lite.? A surprising drink indeed!

Once summer starts hitting full force, my drinking habits turn to long drinks, drinks with plenty of ice, tiki and the like.? There is nothing more satisfying on a hot muggy DC summer day than a tall glass of deliciousness with plenty of ice.

Which brings me to my second drink for MxMo.? I wanted to come up with a tall drink that was refreshing, gingery and easily quaffable.? I started thinking of what flavors went with ginger and I remembered this compote I made last summer.? It was a fantastic rhubarb and ginger compote.? Alright, ginger and rhubarb.? Luckily, I have some freshly made rhubarb syrup!? Thinking about the flavors of ginger and rhubarb my mind immediately went to tequila.? The sweet vegetal flavors of the tequila married with the bite of ginger and the tart/sweet rhubarb had my mouth watering.? Now I just needed something to tie it all together into a tall tasty beverage.? Ting!

(In full disclosure, this was the first time I’ve mixed with Ting and I’m very happy with the results.)

Ginger-Rhubarb Fizz
1.5 oz blanco tequila (I used Inocente)
.75 oz Massenez Creme de Gingembre*
.50 oz Rhubarb syrup**
1 bottle Pink Ting
-Build over ice in a tall chimney glass.? Give a quick stir to combine.? Drink and enjoy!

*A note on the ginger liqueur:? For this drink, I used the Massenez Creme de Gingembre.? I’ve had the bottle for a while and think it is a good product.? It isn’t nearly as sweet as the Domaine de Canton which makes it good to use when you want to watch the sweetness of the drink.? However, the ginger “bite” is a little less pronounced as compared to the Canton.? I think the Canton would be just as delicious in this drink, but with the rhubarb syrup, the sweetness will be proportionally greater.

**For the rhubarb syrup, I combined one large rhubarb stalk, cut into one-inch pieces, with one cup sugar and 3/4 cup water.? Bring to a simmer and cook for 20-30 minutes.? Strain through a fine mesh sieve, pressing on the solids to get all of the liquid out.

Thanks again for Rumdood for hosting this month’s MxMo.

Cheers!

Tonight, as is usual on Thursdays, is Thursday Drink Night over in the Mixoloseum chat room.? The theme is “muddled drinks” and the other day I had an inspiration.? Like last night, it’s a chance to kill two birds with one stone, as the saying has it – this time, to present a new drink for TDN as well as to make one to honor somebody locally, Mr. Derek Brown.

The drink basically jumped almost fully formed into my head.? I just made one, after posting it in the chat room, and people seem to like it!? Kaiser Penguin was even kind enough to take a picture of it and let me use it:

Pretty, ain’t it?

The Derek
3-4 leaves of mint
1/2 ounce Domaine de Canton
3 ounces Dolin Blanc
1 dash orange bitters (Regans #6)
Lightly muddle the mint and Domaine de Canton in an old-fashioned glass.? Add the vermouth, bitters, and ice.? Stir gently to mix.? Garnish with a fresh sprig of mint.

In my opinion, this is a nice, sweet, light drink.? I think it’d make a wonderful digestif or apertif.? Someone else who made one (Chris aka DJ HawaiianShirt) said that it worked well with a “past its prime bottom shelf bottle of French vermouth”, so you have that, too.? Others who thought it was too sweet (such as JohnTheBastard) I suggested additional bitters, though he went with a bit of tonic syrup and something else (I believe club soda).

Enjoy!

[Fourth in a series of drinks named after bloggers, mixologists, and random others who'll hopefully be at Tales.? The first post in the series is here.]